What I Envisioned

WHAT I ENVISIONED

Best of intentions but the wrong decisions
The outcomes not what I envisioned
Restless and out of position
Stranded in a life I never wanted

Chaos rains on aborted missions
Hobbled and out of commission
How can I avoid collision
With this life I never wanted?

Steady lad it’s not that bad
Did you believe
You could hold on to what you had?
Oh it’s not that bad

Uneasy orbit around the unexpected
A tendency toward the misdirected
Cues and clues going undetected
Now I’m standing in this life I never wanted

Once there was such ease to do as I pleased
Fulfill all my needs, I was strong, I was free

Best laid plans bad execution
Another problem with no solution
Days and weeks filled with minutiae
Branded by this life I never wanted

Steady lad it’s not that bad
Did you believe
You could hold on to what you had?
Oh it’s not that bad

Pain comes and goes there’s no mistaking
And when it leaves I’m relieved to be escaping
Now and then the thought occurs that there’s no negating
Suffering is a choice
Suffering is a choice
Suffering is a curse

Steady lad it’s not that bad
Did you believe
You could hold on to what you had?
Oh it’s not that bad